Posted: Tuesday, May 6th, 2014

Is Falling in Love Easy or Hard?

Think you’ve found the one? You may have, and we hope for you it was love at first sight and has brought you nothing but joy and happiness. However, as many couples have found, the road to finding “the one” is not always a smooth ride.

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A good relationship should definitely flow easily and effortlessly however, when two individuals are trying to fit together as a couple compromises have to be made. If this is a problem, then you need to rethink how compatible you are as a couple.

Here, we will look at some ways you can tell if you are really there.

Compromises

barbed_heartCan you stand to make compromises for that special someone? If not, or if that has never come up in your relationship before, pump the brakes. If you truly love someone, and they love you, you and your partner should be more than ready and willing to make compromises. These can be as simple as what you will both watch on TV tonight, what you will eat, or as complicated as how many children you will have in the future. Both of you must come to an agreement on this, and at least one of you will have to be willing to compromise.

Get Ready to Know the Person (REALLY Know Them)

You think we are joking here? Can you imagine your significant other, say, using the restroom? How about them with a skin condition? Or imagine them eating a food you really don’t like. Chances are, you will get to know all these things and more (pretty quickly) about the right person. These things should not offend you. Instead, you should see them as a sign that the other person is growing truly comfortable and intimate with you (albeit in a not so traditional way). Be flattered, not grossed out!

No Judgments

Think you have weird fantasies and dreams you could never share with anyone, not even your partner? Most likely, at some point, you will want to. Be sure to keep your conversations, beliefs, and more judgment free with the other person, especially when talking about things like future plans, dreams, and more. Chances are, this is actually a great way to learn more about them, even if you do not entirely agree (see the paragraph about compromises, above). Feel free to hear them out, and even to try some of their unorthodox ideas. You might like them!

If your core values are aligned, and your consideration for each other is your priority, then compromise shouldn’t be a struggle. It is rare that two people meet each other and everything is perfect. Love is not always easy. This may make love seem intimidating and scary, but as we mentioned before, it really shouldn’t be that way at all. It does however, have to be based in reality to be long lasting. If it’s not ‘real’ it won’t last and there’s always a few bumps along the way as you adjust going from a ‘me’ to a ‘we’.

Above all, listen to your intuition … if your red flags are flying take heed! By the same token when you know it’s right, it’s right – don’t second guess yourself based on past experiences you may have had. Enjoy, let your heart go and revel in your new found happiness.

Posted: Friday, April 25th, 2014

3 Tips for Approaching Women without Looking Desperate or Needy

It’s true what John Gray talks about in his book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus! Men and women are wired very differently, mentally and emotionally.

Here are a few simple but powerful tips for approaching women and keeping your dignity intact.

Get her Attention (without a cheesy pick up line)

Standing in McDonalds with friends at the end of a late night, in a designer outfit (as you do), this guy came up to me and complimented me on my dress. Once he broke the ice he immediately followed that by making a joke that I had gone to a lot of trouble for a late night dinner at Macca’s. He immediately got my attention. What did he do right????

  1. He got his nerve up and simply approached me (how many men are so fearful of rejection they miss lots of opportunities to approach woman).
  2. He gave me a sincere compliment about my outfit.
  3. He showed me his sense of humour by joking about how dressed up I was in a fast food restaurant (good one)!

We flirted and talked till the sun came up the next day. The reason I tell you this story is to show you how easy it is to get a girls attention.

Learn from Confident Women

If you take the time to watch confident women, you will notice something very different in the way women approach men they are attracted to, whether online or in person. Women will initiate contact but will immediately assess the reaction to determine whether it’s time to stay and flirt or cut and run. With the advent of online dating things are so much easier for men and women to reach out and let someone know they’re interested.
For guys here’s a few signals to look for:

post_1She’s very interested – Now here’s where it can get a bit tricky. If a women is very confident and feels like you are an equal partner she will obviously flirt and show interest. However, if a woman is very interested and feels like you may be out of her league, this may rock her confidence any she may become shy and much more introverted in her interactions with you. The way you will know if the shyness is a sign of disinterest or extreme interest is how friendly and warm she is to you. Always listen to your gut feelings. If a woman seems shy but is extremely nice to you SHE IS DEFINITELY INTERESTED.

post_2You’ve peaked her interest but it’s still a maybe. A women will definitely flirt with you to give herself more time to judge her level of interest. If she feels you are “in her lane” then you won’t rock her confidence and she will flirt with you confidently.


post_3No way, even if you were the last man on earth (ok ok I’m exaggerating). If a woman is polite, but there is no warmth in her response and it feels a bit cold, she is just being polite and doesn’t want to be rude or insult you. If you are online you will have to rely on written communications to judge this response. In person you can rely on body language and tone of voice to judge whether or not you are getting the ‘polite not interested’ response. I am one of these women, I never want to hurt anyone’s feelings and I don’t believe in being rude to someone who takes the time to reach out and show their interest.

Know when to cut and run (no seriously, don’t run, leave with your dignity in tact).
If you are getting signals that she is not interested, you will only come off as desperate and needy if you persist. This is a turn off for any woman and not healthy for your own self-esteem. Strangely enough sometimes walking away can peak a woman’s interest. It shows you are confident enough to walk away, and your ego is healthy enough not to take her disinterest personally.
On a positive note, keep on keeping on. Finding the right person doesn’t happen overnight. The key is to have fun along the way. A no means you are not the right fit for that particular person; it’s not the end of the world….next!

Posted: Monday, October 7th, 2013

The Psychology of Dating Nerves

The Psychology of Dating Nerves

The Psychology of Dating Nerves [Infographic] by the team at Christian Dating

Posted: Wednesday, September 18th, 2013

Wait! Don’t Go on Your First Date without the Basics

Posted: Tuesday, September 3rd, 2013

Profile Pictures – The Science of Attraction

Posted: Friday, August 9th, 2013

99 dating ideas

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Active/Outdoorsy

1. Go for a swim, just the two of you

2. Go rock climbing at an indoor rock climbing gym

3. Kayak a river or lake

4. Go hiking

5. Train for a 5k to run or walk together

6. Go camping (just the two of you)

7. Rent or borrow a jet ski

8. Set up a tent in the backyard and order takeout

9. Have a campfire with s’mores

10. Go horseback riding

11. Ride bikes (try renting a tandem)

12. Ice-skating (even more fun in summer months)

13. Roller skating

14. Go bowling

15. Build a snowman together

16. Go sledding

17. Put on some boots and go line dancing

18. Pick fruit together at a local farm

19. Learn to skateboard or roller blade together

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Posted: Friday, July 19th, 2013

Keeping your online relationships healthy and fun

Sometimes we forget to put as much time and effort into our relationships online as much as we do with offline relationships.  It’s as if we’ve forgotten there are real people behind the computer screen in the virtual world of dating with feelings and emotions.

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Make time for that special someone, book in a virtual date

It is so important to make sure you are punctual even when your date is virtual, all the dating rules still apply.  A bit of courtesy can go a long way and will make you stand out from the crowd.

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Posted: Friday, July 12th, 2013

Pickup Lines to Avoid

Learn which pickup lines to avoid from dating expert Rachel DeAlto

Posted: Wednesday, July 10th, 2013

Blind Date Etiquette for Guys

Check out dating coach Rachel DeAlto’s tips on how to flirt and the best way to approach a blind date.

Posted: Friday, July 5th, 2013

Can You Deliberately Attract Your Soul Mate Dating Online?

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Author: Dina Robison – Guest Blogger

The room lighting is dim but there are different color lights.  Flashing.  There are faces, many faces around, but you can’t help but be drawn to just him.  His eyes.  Oh, those eyes!  Locked with yours.  And in that moment you just knew he was the one.  And you were his one.  In that moment.  That moment that you first locked eyes with him…on a computer screen amongst 15 other profiles that showed up in your search.  The lights flashing are ads popping up on the screen.  And he’s not even locking eyes with you but the camera lense that he held up himself to take his profile picture.

Is this the romantic way that you imagine meeting your soul mate?  For me, ech, no way.  As a woman, I can say this seems to be the least ideal way to meet the love of your life.  I used to tell myself, “There’s no way I’m meeting the love of my life online.  It just isn’t going to happen that way.”  And then, just a few months later I met the love of my life online and it happened just that way.  Turns out many other great couples met their partners online, too, and not just the people in the commercials.

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